I tell myself

it’s a wedding, not a funeral

I tell myself

white dress

vows traded through

clasped hands

eyes of two people

happy to drown in the other

it’s a wedding, not a funeral

but I’m wearing black

heart just a deeper shade

of bruise

processional music begins

couple walks down the aisle

wedding, not a funeral–

all I can see is my love

walking out the door

leaving me with a list of

(maybe) nevers

tombstone heart pushing away

the finality in the tolling

of the bell

I tell myself–

there’s always maybe.

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