you were the first

person

anything

that enabled me

to say no.

no.

a delicious

dangerous

empowering word.

one syllable

heavy like

a bomb blast.

they said let you go.

I said no.

my love is mine

to give or withhold.

I’d never dared to risk

displeasure

disapproval

not in the end

for the final

decision, only courting

the idea

of rebellion.

you are still gone

but no comes easier

staying rooted

in myself

not believing I always

must be wrong

if they say

I am

because I say no

every day

holding on to love

holding on to you.