you were the first
person
anything
that enabled me
to say no.
no.
a delicious
dangerous
empowering word.
one syllable
heavy like
a bomb blast.
they said let you go.
I said no.
my love is mine
to give or withhold.
I’d never dared to risk
displeasure
disapproval
not in the end
for the final
decision, only courting
the idea
of rebellion.
you are still gone
but no comes easier
staying rooted
in myself
not believing I always
must be wrong
if they say
I am
because I say no
every day
holding on to love
holding on to you.