there are nights like this
when all my answers
don’t mean anything
and it all just hurts.
i know you don’t feel the same
i know it doesn’t matter anymore
i know.
but i miss you
and i’d do anything
anything
to have you back.
but that’s just me.
and one person out of two
isn’t enough.
i’ve been telling myself
that i’ll get used to being alone
that i’ll always miss you but
it’ll be fine.
but tonight–
tonight i’m just not okay with that
and it feels insane to think
i’ll ever be.
but it doesn’t matter how i feel
because you–
you’re already okay.
i’ve been carrying you around
like some kind of talisman
memories to keep me warm
and now–now i feel like
i don’t even
have that.
i bury them deep
deeper than they already were
and it’s supposed to make me feel better
but it just makes me feel cold.
how can i think about a lifetime alone
when i can’t even handle
tonight?