Introducing… Elemental!

As I have been waiting for feedback on The Hunted, I have begun work work on a new project.  Only a few chapters in, I am still getting to know my characters and setting, but it has been a fantastic ride so far.  While The Hunted has seven different points of view and is written in past tense, third person limited, Elemental has one point of view, only three characters, and is written in first person present tense.   So far, I have enjoyed the challenge of writing a completely different story and putting my imagination to work in new ways.  Because I am writing almost every day, most of the book will be complete by the beginning of May.

So–drum roll please!

Introducing… Elemental.

Elemental

Genre: Fantasy
Audience: Young Adult
Series: Trilogy
Status: In Progress

Premise:

Sixteen year old gladiator Kat Skia has been forced to fight a new opponent every week—and she’s beginning to turn into the cruel panther she fights as.  But when cocky, mischievous Tristan smirks his way into her life and refuses to leave, she is increasingly forced to choose between friendship and her warrior ways.

As Kat trains for the tournament in which she believes she will win her freedom, she struggles with her increasingly electric relationship with Tristan—and the voices that won’t leave her head.  When she finds a mysterious book hidden in her cell in the training complex beneath the arena sands, she races to discover why she was imprisoned… before the final fight when it’s too late.

Will Kat unravel the mystery of the voices and the book?  Will her and Tristan’s relationship survive the arena?  Or will hate triumph over love?

The Hunted–Progress Report 2

As of Wednesday, March 25, 2015, The Hunted became an officially completed fourth draft!  For the first time ever, someone other than myself will read the entire manuscript, and soon other beta readers will follow… and I am more nervous than I had expected.

The Hunted turned out to be an experimental piece–I knew where it was going, but the darkness and intensity of the piece surprised me as I was writing.  I poured everything I am into the first draft, ignoring the sinking doubt that whispered, it’s not good enough, not good enough, not good enough…  During the subsequent drafts, I allowed that nagging worry to help me purposefully shape the story and prose into (hopefully) something beautiful.  I did not allow myself to listen to that nasty, fearful voice while I was writing, but now, waiting for the feedback from my first reader, I am definitely a bit scared.

Although I definitely write for myself, as all writers do, I also write to share with others.  And to work on a story for almost a year to discover that it does not live up to readers’ expectations, that you do not live up to readers’ expectations, is a terrifying possibility.  Although you tell yourself that others’ opinions do not matter, you are lying to yourself.  When you finish the story, let go of this blinding beauty and mighty song that has been building in your head and heart for the last who-knows-how-many months, the truth bleeds through.

You are afraid of failure.

More than that, afraid of rejection.

But you desire honesty even more.

Once you reconcile yourself with this, the feedback process becomes much less painful.  Not completely painless, but bearable, and perhaps even enjoyable.  I desire honest feedback above all else; how I deal with that feedback will come later.  I do want to know if I have achieved my goal or not, or if I have unwittingly achieved a different one.  Daring to fail is part of being an artist.  And in the end, you never truly fail.

I truly am excited to share The Hunted with you all, no matter what the results may be!  The following are a few quotes about art, risks, and mistakes.  I hope you are encouraged as I was.

“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.  Art is knowing which ones to keep.” -Scott Adams

“Go and make interesting mistakes, make amazing mistakes, make glorious and fantastic mistakes.  Break rules.  Leave the world more interesting for your being here.  Make.  Good.  Art.” -Neil Gaiman

“To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.” -Joseph Chilton Pierce

“We don’t make mistakes, just happy little accidents.” -Bob Ross

The Hunted–Progress Report

The Hunted is the near future urban thriller I am currently editing (learn more about it here).  I am working on the fourth draft and have been surprised to discover how my characters have come alive during the editing process.  A couple months ago, I stumbled upon the song “Better Than I know Myself” by Adam Lambert, which perfectly describes the relationship between two of my favorite characters, Astrid and Nate.  I love their friendship because although they are not siblings by blood, they have become brother and sister through love and circumstance.  Their tenderness and devotion toward each other is wonderfully expressed in the song.  I found pictures of my characters online and combined the images with the lyrics, and I couldn’t resist sharing the result with you.

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“Bean”

“Bean” is a flash fiction story about a mysterious girl and her young tag along.

Bean

The Ferris wheel spun, twisted, and spurned us from the heights, its neon green lights spasming in the darkness.  I lay on my back in the sand, watching it turn as the cold ocean waters lapped at my sinking heels.  A warm little hand wormed its way into mine.  I started at first, then smiled, squeezing gently back.  Finally.  How long had it been?  Two weeks?  A month?

“Sar-ah?”  A childish voice from the darkness to my left.  The first word.  What would she say next?

“Yes, Bean?”  Maybe she would protest at her nickname, although I thought she liked it.  She had never worked up the courage to tell me.  It fit her skinny, six year old frame.

“What’s a canned ham?”  I almost laughed, but I didn’t want to scare her.

“A canned ham?  Well, it’s almost like jello, but ham.  In a can.”

There was a small pause.  Then, “What’s jello?”  Jello?  She didn’t know what jello was?  Anger twisted inside me, a snake rearing its ugly head, but I batted it away.  No, not tonight.  There would be time for that later.

“How ’bout I show you, Bean?  Would you like that?”  The small hand wrapped around my finger in response, tugging me up.  This time I did laugh, and a little giggle answered from the void.  How I would manage to find jello at a fair, I had no idea… but I would find it.  I would tear the world apart for jello, if that’s what it took.  I shook my head as we walked up the beach, Bean’s little footsteps thudding softly beside me.  How hard it would be to let her go.  But it was necessary.  The shudder that followed the thought had nothing to do with the chill ocean breeze.

As we crested the dunes, the light from the Ferris wheel caught in Bean’s stringy blond hair and turned her eyes to glowing emerald.

“Normal”

“Normal” is a poem that I wrote when I became frustrated with how people act in public.  I was at school, watching how everyone walked with their head down, shoulders hunched, hands stuffed in their pockets.  Whenever anyone held a door open for me or smiled at me, it made my day, because often I felt unnoticed and unimportant, almost unwanted.  I think many people hide loneliness like this, acting “normal” like everyone else, but inside just wishing that a stranger would do anything, even smile, to let them know that they are not alone.

 

Normal

The standard walk,

The standard talk,

Head down,

Eyes low,

Words short,

Words clipped,

Mouth downturned,

Frown fixed.

 

Acknowledge no one

But yourself

Or else,

Or else.

This is normal,

And normal

You will be.

 

But when the rebel

Grins,

You’d be surprised

Who smiles

Back.

“Leashed”

“Leashed” is a flash fiction piece inspired by a prompt that asked me to write about a character exploring a structure he had never seen before.  I chose a set of monkey bars, and this was the result.

Leashed

The steel bars glinted in the dying sunlight, gleaming dully like winter’s first frost.  The structure formed a rectangle with the ground, two vertical ladders topped with a longer horizontal one, the cylindrical rungs spaced about two feet apart.  I stood on my tiptoes and ran a hand along the ceiling ladder, letting my fingers skip from cold rung to rung.  Footsteps crunched behind me, and I whirled around, jerking my hands away from the welded metal and shoving them deep in my pockets.  I exhaled at seeing the swinging brown ponytail and ratty navy sweatshirt.  I turned my back to the girl, laying a heavy hand on the top rung of the closest ladder, but the muscles in my back and shoulders remained tense.  “What do you want, Kalia.”

She snorted.  “Whatcha doin’ out here, tough guy?”

The muscle in my neck pulsed.  “Can’t you leave me alone for more than ten minutes?”  The frustration of my body bled into my words, stretching them like taught tendons.  I climbed up the ladder and hung from the first bar set high above the frozen earth, swinging my legs for momentum.  Gripping the next bar, I stared back at Kalia and raised my eyebrows, daring her to tell me to get down, that I didn’t belong.

“Stop that.  I’m not going to challenge your freedom, stupid.”  My spine tingled at her mocking tone, tossing my own words from the previous trial back at me.  “Your little acts of rebellion are only going to send one message—I’m Mister Idiot.  I mean, what kid’s never seen a set of monkey bars before.”

“I can do whatever the heck I want to.”  I leaped for the next bar with both hands, enjoying the slumping jerk as I caught it.  I could feel the power awakening in my body.  Oh, to fight again.  Oh, for the smooth leather pommel of my sword Scintath in my hands.

“If the elders hear you talking like that, you’ll land back in jail before you can say jackrabbit.”

Hooking my heel over the side, I swung myself on top of the bars into a sitting position.  I let my legs hang over the side and kicked my feet back and forth, feeling gravity tug at my heavy combat boots.

I stared at Kalia, taking in her skinny frame, her hands cocked on her hips, her disapproving brown eyes.  I had seen, much less talked to, very few girls in my life, but somehow I was sure that this one was a rarity among womankind.  The assassin’s life didn’t lend itself to meeting girls, especially not ones that lived ten seconds past the moment you saw them.  Usually, they only had time to say “oh.”  Did I want to live that life?  Did I really want the elders to just kick me out of their city of Saroth to wander on my way, leaving a trail of blood behind?  Was there more to life than death?

I shook my head to clear it.  Those kinds of thoughts would get me killed.  “Death is the only goal of life” was the assassin’s motto.  Hold true to that, and I would stay alive.  That was all that mattered.

I jumped off the—monkey bars?  Was that it?—and stalked out of the clearing, entering the forest surrounding it.  Kalia’s tennis shoes crunched through the leaves in my wake.

“And where do you think you’re going?”

I smiled slightly at her sass.  “Are all girls this cute when they’re mad?”

“What?  Arggh.”  There was a dull thump of shoe hitting the earth, probably obliterating some poor insect in the process.

“Hey, I was just asking.”

The footsteps halted suddenly, and I stopped too.

“Kath… be careful.”  It came like a leaf floating on the wind, so quiet I wasn’t sure if she had spoken at all.  Overcome with a sudden urgency, I turned, her name on my tongue… and she was gone.  My shoulders slumped.  I turned back to the lonely path before me, kicking at dying bits of crimson, burnt orange, and brittle brown.  The bare black branches of the trees stretched like interlocking fingers across the colorless sky, locking me in, an eternal cage.

“Do You Ever?”

“Do You Ever?” is a piece made almost entirely of questions.  As you read it, think about each question, apply it to your own life, your own heart.  You may be surprised at what you find.

 

Do You Ever?

Do you like your life? I mean, really?

Would you change anything at all? Or maybe a lot, everything?

Do you have a purpose? If you decide you don’t, do you wish you had one?

When you watch movies with lots of danger, fighting, saving the world stuff–adventure–do you wish that world was your own? Do you wonder, like I do, if you would love it, or hate it, if you were there?

Do you ever feel like you were called to do more than what you are? Do you ever long to make a difference, or at least try?

Or how about this– do you ever wonder if the lack of suffering, of striving, or honest-to-goodness effort in your life, is wrong? That sitting on your blessings, on your abilities as a human being, is wrong?

Do you ever feel like you are ignoring your heart?  I do.

When the days drag long, monotonous, full of empty business in which nothing important actually gets done, are you ever overtaken with a sudden urge to drop everything, and just go, be someone else?

Where would you go?  Visit a protest in China, maybe?  A house arrest in Vietnam?  Or maybe a ship sinking in the frigid Artic Circle?

Who would you be? What would you do?  I mean, every hero, or even every well-meaning person, or hero-wanna-be, has to have a goal.  What would yours be?

Would you want to help people in bad situations?  No, not just the bad ones, the really bad ones?

Would you dare risk your life for a stranger?  I think I would.  I think it’s worth it.  Do you?

Your weapon of choice, what would it be?  A sword?  A pistol?  Mace?  A bazooka, maybe? Or even just your words?

Would you sneak around, anonymous?  Or would you like to be famous, instead?

Would there be a reward, do you think?  Or would you even like a reward?  Would it take away from the whole point?

What about friendship?  Is that a big enough reward?  I think so.

Save a life, make a friend.  Those are good goals to start with.  Stay alive?  Yes, let’s add that.

So when will you go?  Today, tomorrow?  You will go, won’t you?

“Run Like Water, Burn Like the Sun”

“Run Like Water, Burn Like the Sun” is a short flash fiction piece that I wrote in response to a writing prompt, and turned out to be lots of fun to write.  I hope it’s just as much fun to read!

 

Run Like Water, Burn Like the Sun

“Why are you so angry?”

I stare back at the eyes peeking over the back of the grey wooden pew. “Stow it, Marie.”

The shock of red hair disappears again, and I continue painting. Back and forth, back and forth. The rhythm of the brush is soothing, a kind of haven.

“Why did you pick such a boring color?”

I sigh. “It’s blue, Marie. Do you have some kind of problem with the color blue?”

“No–it’s just… boring.”

“Hmph. I think it’s a good sensible color.”

“Sensible is often just another word for boring.”

My brush pauses for a second. “Are you painting over there?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Well then do more painting and less talking.”

Blessed silence.

Then, “I think blue’s a sad color.”

“I don’t.”

“You don’t have to be so snappy, you know. I think you picked blue because you’re sad.”

“Marie…”

“What? It’s true. The whole town knows it.” A brush waves an arc above the bench, paint splattering on my face. That stupid girl can never keep her hands still when she talks.

I don’t answer, and neither of us say anything for a good while. Then, “I think… I think anger, is just–maybe–a way of being sad.” The words come low and quiet, but it feels like an arrow. I suck in a breath.

“Stop babbling, child.”

“I’m not a child. You’re only four years older than I am, and I’m sixteen.”

“What does it matter. All this fuss about a color. You’re stuck with the same color that I am, so there.”

Silence from the other side of the bench.

“There.” I rock back on my heels, surveying my work. “I’m done. You?”

“Just almost…” A brush flicks up into the air, as if ending a sweeping arc. But that brush… it’s small. Too delicate for the broad painting of an ordinary church pew.

“Marie…”

“I’m done, I’m done! Chill out, already.” There is a soft snap, like the closing of a clasp. The willowy girl rises to her feet, brushing a runaway red-gold strand of hair behind her ear. Her green eyes seem fresh, as if they had just been born, supercharged with living honey. “I guess I’ll see you at church, huh Elise?” She walks backwards, a lopsided smirk on her face. “Hey, and remember to smile!” She turns around and strides out the wide stone arch, a small black case swinging loosely from her fingers.

“Hmph.” The room feels empty without her, but I don’t want to admit it, even to myself. I scrub my hands down my face. Ew, I forgot about the paint. My fingers come away smudged with orange. Orange?

A speck of color catches my eye. A fleck of green paint lies streaked against the dark stone floor.

Marie.

I shove myself up from my knees and hurry around to the other side of the bench. The blast of color snatches my breath from me.

A bright flame of color fairly bursts from the formerly dull, cracking wood. The entire spectrum of color is somehow incorporated into the painting, featuring a burning sun fading into pale blues, indigoes, and forest greens, a depiction of the downfall of night so alive it is almost breathing. How I know it is a sunrise, I have no idea. But I just know.

Even more unexplainable are the tears I cannot stop. They trickle down my cheeks and splash against the stone. And I kneel for a second time, not to grudgingly paint a pew, but to let my poorly disguised sadness run from me like water and burn like the sun in the painting. The sadness is much more beautiful in death, the banishing of the night–into joy.

Contest Entry: “Finley”

Tessa Emily Hall–author of Purple Moon– hosts a weekly writing competition on her blog, and today I came in second!

Below is my entry:

Finley

I just stand there, looking at her. Finley’s wispy brown hair blows across her face, twisting in the cold breeze. Solemn green eyes peek between the strands. She sniffs and swipes at the grime on her cheek with the back of her hand. Somehow she’s even more beautiful dirt-streaked–if that’s even possible. Something else shines through her exhaustion– in her wide, solid stance, in the anger hardening her eyes, in the whitened knuckles of her clenched fists. She’s not defeated–no. She’s fighting inside, building to the climax, the final battle, the deepest kind of strength bleeding through the outer wounds.

“All right, Adrian?”

She’s caught me staring. Again. I smirk, beyond caring by now. Hoping that maybe she doesn’t mind–maybe hoping for more than that. No, not hoping– aching.

“I guess.” I shrug, lifting one shoulder and letting it drop again.

She sighs and shakes her head. “Of course you’re not. I’m so stupid.”

“No you’re not.” I want to say more than that. Do more than that. Want to run my fingers through that flyaway hair. But I won’t, because I’m afraid I’ll scare her away. If she runs, I’ll die, burn inside. Be reduced to a twisted mess of ashes and smoke, just like our city.

She’s all I have left.My Badge

Hello, Hello!

Hello everyone!

I am beyond excited to launch this new site.  It is my hope to post at least twice a week, whether that be musings, pictures, creative fragments, updates, scriptures, a little bit about my life, or a short tidbit that I have written–in short, whatever I can dream up!  My goal will be to weave little bits of life into something beautiful, something like—dare I call it—art.

I invite you to explore the site and check back for new posts.  I am always excited to receive any feedback you may have. If you would like to read a little bit more specifically about the blog and its purpose, refer to “The Blog” page.

Thanks for reading!